Parenting plans are designed to ensure children have some stability when their parents are living separately. Whether you’ve gone through a divorce or are just living apart from your ex, you both have an obligation to follow the court-approved custody plan.
If your ex chooses not to follow your agreed-upon plan or decides to ignore your wishes altogether, you need to act to protect your rights and your family. A knowledgeable child custody attorney in Knoxville can help you understand your options when the other parent doesn’t follow your parenting plan.
What is a Parenting Plan in Tennessee?
In Tennessee, a parenting plan is a legal document that outlines how parents will share custody and decision-making responsibilities after a separation or divorce. Under Tennessee Code §36-6-401, every final custody order must include one. It includes a detailed residential schedule (when the child will be with each parent), who has the authority to make decisions about education, healthcare, and other major issues, and how disputes between parents will be resolved.
The goal is to minimize conflict and ensure the child’s best interests are consistently met, even when the parents no longer live together.
Is it Obvious that the Other Parent Is Violating the Plan?
Unfortunately, not every parent sticks to the court-approved schedule. You might be dealing with a parenting plan violation if the other parent:
- Frequently shows up late or misses scheduled exchanges
- Refuses to return your child on time
- Withholds the child from you for extended periods
- Unilaterally makes decisions about school or healthcare
- Fails to communicate or co-parent in good faith
These violations can disrupt your child’s life and strain your ability to maintain a healthy relationship with them. And more importantly, they go against what the court already determined was in your child’s best interest.
What Should I Do if the Parenting Plan Isn’t Being Followed?
If your ex is neglecting the plan, don’t wait and hope things improve on their own. Taking the right steps early can help you protect your rights—and your child.
1. Keep Detailed Records
Start by documenting each violation. Note dates, times, and details of missed pickups, withheld visitation, or inappropriate behavior. Save any written communication like texts, emails, or messages that show noncompliance or a refusal to cooperate.
Courts want evidence—not just allegations—so these records may become vital if legal action is needed.
2. Try to Resolve the Conflict Peacefully
In some cases, parenting plan issues can be worked out through communication. If you feel safe and comfortable doing so, calmly raise the issue with the other parent. Explain how their actions are impacting your child and why it’s important to stick to the plan.
That said, if communication is difficult or hostile, you may want to involve a neutral third party or skip this step altogether. Your attorney can help you decide how best to proceed.
3. Consider Mediation
Tennessee encourages mediation as a first step in resolving custody and parenting disputes. A trained mediator can help you and your ex revisit the parenting plan and reach a workable solution.
Mediation can often lead to faster, less stressful resolutions than going to court. But it only works when both parents are willing to participate in good faith.
4. File for Contempt of Court
If informal efforts fail and the other parent continues to violate the plan, you have legal options. Because a parenting plan is a court order, repeated violations can be considered contempt of court.
Filing a motion for contempt asks the judge to enforce the existing plan. If found in contempt, the other parent could face:
- Fines or attorney’s fees
- Jail time (in serious cases)
- Mandatory parenting classes or counseling
- Changes to the custody arrangement
While courts may hesitate to issue harsh penalties for minor or one-time violations, persistent noncompliance often prompts stronger consequences.
5. Seek a Custody Modification
In cases where the other parent’s behavior is persistent, harmful, or shows no signs of improving, it may be time to ask the court for a modification to the parenting plan.
To modify custody or parenting time in Tennessee, you must prove a material change in circumstances. Frequent violations, alienation of the child, or behaviors that put the child at risk may meet this legal standard.
You’ll also need to show that the proposed change serves your child’s best interests. A lawyer can help you gather the necessary documentation and present a compelling case.
Why Should I Work with a Custody Attorney?
It’s frustrating—and often scary—when the other parent refuses to follow the plan. But reacting out of emotion or retaliating with your own violations can make things worse.
Instead, let Attorney John Haines help you take the right steps.
John has helped parents across Knoxville and East Tennessee enforce parenting plans, modify custody orders, and protect their relationships with their children. He’ll listen to your story, walk you through your legal options, and advocate for a resolution that puts your child’s stability first.
Whether you need help documenting violations, negotiating through mediation, or going back to court, Haines Family Law will fight for the outcome your family deserves.
FAQs about Custody & Parenting Plans
Can I withhold parenting time if the other parent isn’t following the plan?
No. Even if the other parent is violating the parenting plan, you must continue to follow it unless a court tells you otherwise. Withholding your child without court approval could hurt your case and may be seen as a violation yourself. Instead, document the issue and speak with a family law attorney about legal options.
What if my child doesn’t want to go with the other parent?
You should still follow the parenting plan unless there’s a safety concern. If your child is consistently resistant, it may be a sign that the current arrangement isn’t working. An attorney can help you determine whether a modification might be appropriate and how to present that to the court. If there’s a significant cause for alarm, you could consider filing for a temporary custody order.
Can parenting plan violations impact child support?
Not directly. Parenting time violations don’t automatically change child support. However, if the custody arrangement is modified due to repeated violations, the child support amount could be recalculated to reflect the new schedule.
Do I have to go to court every time the parenting plan is violated?
Not always. For minor or one-time issues, informal communication or mediation may be enough. But if the violations are frequent or serious, going to court may be necessary to enforce the plan or seek a change. A family law attorney can help you decide when legal action makes sense.
How long does it take to resolve a parenting plan dispute in Tennessee?
The timeline depends on how the issue is addressed. Mediation can resolve disputes in weeks, while court proceedings may take several months or longer—especially if custody modifications are involved. Acting quickly and working with an attorney can help move the process along.
Talk to a Knoxville Custody Lawyer Today
If your child’s other parent is ignoring the parenting plan, don’t try to handle it on your own. With the right legal strategy, you can restore structure—and protect your role in your child’s life.
Call Haines Family Law at 865-269-2524 or contact us online to schedule your free 20-minute consultation.
